July 2011 Viewings

18 flicks this month, helped along largely by the girls' weekend away and yesterday's month-ending APE-Fest (which will be covered in a separate post).

CABIN FEVER 2
Surprisingly entertaining, high-school-centric contagiony sequel to the Eli Roth original. Best prom-based horror flick since DANCE OF THE DEAD. (Buy at Amazon)

KICK-ASS
Heard good things about this but felt it paled in comparison the grittier, more subversive SUPER. Nic Cage makes up for a lot of past sins with his Adam West-y delivery but the whole affair feels too slick and polished. (Buy at Amazon)

MORTUARY
Christopher George is in grizzled overdrive as the mortuary owner who may or may not be having black masses with suburban housewives, including the MILF-y Mrs. Christopher George. Bill Paxton, in one of his earliest roles, acts his ass off as C-George's creepy, classical music-loving embalmer son. (Buy at Amazon)

UNDISPUTED III
Never expected that there'd be a third installment of this prison boxing/MMA series but here it is. Michael Jai White is gone but Scott Adkins returns as the crippled Boyka who works his way into a "winner gets his freedom" tourney featuring prison fighters from all over the globe. High octance check-your-brain-at-the-door fun. (Buy at Amazon)

RACE WITH THE DEVIL
A childhood fave now out on DVD. Warren Oates, Peter Fonda and their wives take what they hope will be a peaceful RV trip through the South, only to witness a Satanic human sacrifice that lands them smack dab in what appears to be a cult that involves all of Texas. (Buy at Amazon)

PHENOMENA
My Summer of Argento Reassessment continues with this oddly trashy offering from the Italian Hitchcock. This one has razor-wielding monkeys, maggot pits, monster kids, decapitations and ear-splitting metal, yet it failed to click with me. Though the last 20 minutes sure try to make it up to me! (Buy at Amazon)

UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: REGENERATION
When a rebel leader threatens to blow up Chernobyl *and* kidnaps two of the Russian leader's kids, it's time to call in the Universal Soldiers. Unfortunately, the original recipe versions are no match for US 2.0 and it's up to JCVD to save the day. A fast-paced and violent romp. (Buy at Amazon)

BLOODY BIRTHDAY
Had not seen this since it made its way to the local dumping ground during the late 80s. A fun and sinister "killer kids" flick packed with nudity and nutjob plotting plus Michael Dudikoff as Julie Brown's bleach blonde boy toy. Eases up a little too much at the end but good dopey fun. (Buy at Amazon)

STAGEFRIGHT
One of those "Where Have You Been All My Life?" 80s trashterpieces from Michele Soavi. A deranged killer torments a group of MTV video rejects rehearsing a musical about a dancing owl-headed rapist. Bonkers. (Buy at Amazon)

ANGRY RANGER
Guy comes home after his prison term, only to discover his neighborhood is overrun by various gangs. After getting drunk and eating some night snacks he beats everybody up.

UP FROM THE DEPTHS
80s Corman aquahorror that falls into that trap of being a little *too* jokey. Hoping the disc's second feature – DEMON OF PARADISE – salvages the purchase somewhat. (Buy at Amazon)

NEVER SLEEP AGAIN
Not-to-be-missed epic (4 hours!) documentary on the ELM STREET franchise. Even if, like me, your interest in the series waned a bit after the third installment this is an exhaustive, entertaining and informative look at Freddy, Wes Craven, New Line and much more. (Buy at Amazon)

TIME OF APES
Totally insane Japanese PLANET OF THE APES rip-off tv show edited down from 20-some episodes to a somewhat incoherent 90 minute movie. Two kids and a researcher get frozen in a lab accident and wake up on a planet of apes who drive 70s muscle cars. LARGE portions of the show's middle are completely excised and only referred to in passing. Makes the horrendous 70s RETURN TO THE PLANET OF THE APES cartoon appear Shakesperian by comparison. (Buy at Amazon)

Look for complete report on yesterday's APE-Fest to come!