Tuesday, March 13, 2007

SUBURBAN SECRETS

You know a film is in trouble when the promo sheet’s main selling point is, “Campaign evokes TV smash hit Desperate Housewives…”

Fashion photo boob shots lead us through the opening credits, and from there the sleazy soap opera kicks right in, bad, bad dialogue, bad, bad acting and all. During a breezy magazine photo session, plus-size model Laura Spencer (Isadora Edison) gets a call from her sister Winnifred (Chelsea Mundae); it seems that her aunt Cynthia (Tina Tyler) is going to be moving in with Laura’s ex-boyfriend, and Winni’s boss, “that eminent local attorney” Nelson Nighland. This prompts Laura to return to her hometown of Walden Springs, but not before satisfying in the most forced softcore of ways the “awful schoolgirl crush” of her younger, slimmer, hotter female photographer Jennine (Andrea Davis).

Read Crites' complete review here.

No comments: